Conditional tag-like function to tell if post is in trash?

You could use get_post_status():

function is_trash( $post_id = 0 )
{
    0 == $post_id and $post_id = get_the_ID();
    return 'trash' === get_post_status( $post_id );
}

Side note: To get a list of all registered post status objects use get_post_stati() – yes, that’s wrong.

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