The BuddyPress bar shows notifications e.g. when someone friends you.
I think you have to search then for BuddyPress plugins that enable your 3 requirements.
and add the code to the filter for the bar on top.
or widget-tify the activity stream per user enriched with whatever more data
Maybe you can even award points for all interaction like here and like the BuddyPress CubePoints plugin
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