The problem seems to be you not deciding what is the “staging” server for. If it is for content staging/creation than it is actually a production server from software development POV. Anything that assumes that the software is functioning well and results in something being actually published is part of the production system.
You need a different server for software development needs. With two distinct server your problem becomes a simple communication and planning problem.
Good communication can also help in using the same server, but it is easier to be able to have two separate ones when you both need access to “staging” functionality.
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