Writing a function to detect an event

My include has a handful of custom hooks which handle enqueuing, dequeuing and inserting custom HTML.

I’m still not 100% certain what you mean, but if this code is normal WordPress code, with functions and add_action(), and you only want those hooks to run on these events pages, then the proper way to do this would be to include that file into your theme’s functions file or plugin’s main plugin file, and then use your condition inside those hooks.

So in your functions file, just include your other file (I’ve used get_theme_file_path() instead of get_template_directory(), which is the preferred method these days):

require get_theme_file_path( 'inc/tribe-events.php' );

Then inside that file you would have your hooks like this:

function my_hooked_function( $arg ) {
    if (
        tribe_is_event() || 
        tribe_is_event_category() || 
        tribe_is_in_main_loop() || 
        tribe_is_view() || 
        'tribe_events' == get_post_type() || 
        is_singular( 'tribe_events' )
    ) {
        // Do thing.
    }
}
add_action( 'hook_name', 'my_hooked_function' );

function my_second_hooked_function( $arg ) {
    if (
        tribe_is_event() || 
        tribe_is_event_category() || 
        tribe_is_in_main_loop() || 
        tribe_is_view() || 
        'tribe_events' == get_post_type() || 
        is_singular( 'tribe_events' )
    ) {
        // Do thing.
    }
}
add_action( 'another_hook_name', 'my_second_hooked_function' );

Or, to reduce the amount of code, you could define your own conditional function that you can re-use:

function is_tribe_calendar() {
    if (
        return tribe_is_event() || 
        tribe_is_event_category() || 
        tribe_is_in_main_loop() || 
        tribe_is_view() || 
        'tribe_events' == get_post_type() || 
        is_singular( 'tribe_events' )
    ) {
        return true;
    } else {
        return false;
    }
}

function my_hooked_function( $arg ) {
    if ( is_tribe_calendar() ) {
        // Do thing.
    }
}
add_action( 'hook_name', 'my_hooked_function' );

function my_second_hooked_function( $arg ) {
    if ( is_tribe_calendar() ) {
        // Do thing.
    }
}
add_action( 'another_hook_name', 'my_second_hooked_function' );