For the .htaccess-question, Stephen has a nice answer to that here:
WordPress will overwrite the entries between ‘# BEGIN WordPress’ and ‘# END WordPress’. While most plugins will create their own begin and end tags and only update within those tags.
Simply put your custom entries outside of any custom tags/comments and
they SHOULD be preserved when WP updates the file.
You can change the address of the admin login using either an existing plugin (Google “change wordpress login url”), or by modifying the .htaccess-file. See this answer for more info.
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