Suitable hook when creating, updating and deleting posts programmatically

Hooks are not for deleting or creating posts, they are kind of event listeners. For example ‘delete_post’: “Fires immediately before a post is deleted from the database.” [https://developer.wordpress.org/reference/hooks/delete_post/]

You need to use the WordPress REST API:
https://developer.wordpress.org/rest-api/reference/posts/

This article by Misha Rudrastyh gives a good intro: https://rudrastyh.com/wordpress/rest-api-create-delete-posts.html