Facebook-like Notification Plugin for WordPress Community Blog Sites?

The BuddyPress bar shows notifications e.g. when someone friends you.

I think you have to search then for BuddyPress plugins that enable your 3 requirements.
and add the code to the filter for the bar on top.

or widget-tify the activity stream per user enriched with whatever more data

Maybe you can even award points for all interaction like here and like the BuddyPress CubePoints plugin

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